Succubus Blues CHAPTER 21

I had no boyfriend. Despite each(prenominal) the uncertainties in my world, that at least was one thing I could feel confident ab come forth. Unfortunately, this nephilim apparently had a more than optimistic view of my love life.I dont retire who youre talking ab push through, I shouted to my empty office. Do you hear me, you son of a bitch? I dont enumerate apart who youre fucking talking more or less noneone responded.Paige, passing by a moment later, stuck her head inside. Did you c each told me?no(prenominal) I grumbled. She wore a trick out that clung distinctly to her swelling belly. It didnt help my mood any. Just talking to myself. I closed the door subsequently she left hand.My immediate impulse was to run for help. Carter. Jerome. Somebody. Anybody. I couldnt deal with this alone.Fail or involve any of your eonian contacts and no amount of safekeeping will do him any entire.Damn it. I didnt regular(a) k nowadays who he was. Frantically, I essay to figur e out who among my mortal acquaintances could cause been mistaken by the nephilim as something more. As if it wasnt hard enough being my friend already.Surprisingly or possibly non my cerebrations now strayed to band. I thought about our recent rapport. Censored and proper certainly, just in time warm. Still office and natural. Still occasionally making me catch my breath when we touched.No, that was wooden-headed. My fascination with him was shallow. His books made me suffer from hero worship, and our fellowship had become a sort of rebound from papist. Whatever crush or minor draw play hed had for me had to be fading fast. Hed shown no separate indications of more-than-friends feelings, and my distancing had to be having an effect. Besides, he still kept disappearing for mysterious meetings, credibly for some girl he was too shy to tell me about. It was presumptuous of me to even pack him in a boyfriend category.Yet would the nephilim know any of that? Who knew wh at the bastard was thinking? If it had observed lot and me having our chocolate chats, it might assume anything. Fear clenched me, making me want to instantaneously run upstairs and see on Seth. only if no. That would be a waste, for now at least. He was writing, in public, border by people. The nephilim would not attack him in such(prenominal) a setting.Who else then? Warren perhaps? That voyeur nephilim had watched us give style sex. If that didnt count as some sort of relationship, I didnt know what did. Of course, the nephilim would discombobulate in addition observed that Warren and I almost neer interacted in any other home(a) representation. unfore potbellyful Warren. Sex with me had already wiped him out it would be beyond cruel if he became a tar bilk for the nephilims bizarrely set humor. Fortunately, I had already seen Warren come in today. He was busy in his office, merely perhaps that still counted as safe. Alone he might be, but any screams from a nephi lim attack would immediately draw attention.Doug? He and I had always had a perky flirtation. Certainly one might consider his sporadic pursuit of me indicative of something more than friendship. Yet, in the last few weeks, he and I hadnt talked very(prenominal) much. Id been too distracted by the nephilim attacks. Those, and Roman.Ah, Roman. T present it was, the possibility that had been hovering in the back of my mind. The reality Id been avoiding because it meant contacting him, breaking the lock in Id tried so hard to maintain. I didnt know what was between us, other than a scorching attraction and the occasional tug of solidarity. I didnt know if it was love or the trip of love or whatever. but I knew I cared about him. A lot. I miss him. Cutting myself off completely had been the safest way to recover, to get over my longing and move on. I feared what reinitiating contact could do.And yet because I cared about him, I could not let this nephilim prey upon him. I could not risk Romans life in this because, really, he probably was the most equivalently enddidate. Half the bookstore staff still considered us an item why not the nephilim ? Especially in light of how touchy-feely wed been on a number of outings. Any stalking nephilim would be well justified in reading that as romantic attachment I optioned up my electric cell tele headphone and called him with bated breath. No answer.Shit, I swore, listening to his voice mail. Hi Roman, its me. I know I wasnt, uh, sacking to call you anymore, but somethings come up and I really need to talk to you. As soon as possible. Its really weird, but its really important too. Please call me. I left him both my cell and the bookstore numbers.I disconnected, then sat and pondered. Now what did I do? On impulse, I glanced at the staff directory and dialed Dougs shoes number. He had the day off.No answer, just uniform Roman. Where was everybody? shifty my attention back to Roman, I tried to figure out where he would be. Work, most likely. Unfortunately, I didnt know where that was. What a negligent pseudo-girlfriend I was. Hed utter he taught at a community college. He referred to it all the era, but it was always at school or at the college. Hed neer mentioned the name.I turned to my reckoner and did a research for local community colleges. When the search returned several hits for Seattle alone, I swore again. More existed outside of the city too, in the suburbs and neighboring sister cities. Any of them could be possibilities. I printed out a list of all of them, with phone numbers, and stuffed the paper in my purse. I needed to get out of here, needed to take this search to the field.I capableed my office door to leave and flinched. Another identically written note hung on my door. I peered around in the offices hallway, half hoping to see something. Nothing. I pulled the note deplete and opened it.Youre losing time and men. Youve already lost the writer. Youd best get a move -on with this scavenger hunt.Scavenger hunt indeed, I muttered, crumpling the note. Youre such an asshole.But what did he mean about losing the writer? Seth? My pulse quickened, and I raced up to the cafe, earning a few startled behaviors along the way.No Seth. His corner was empty.Wheres Seth? I demanded of Bruce. He was just here.He was, concurred the barista. Then he short packed up and left.Thanks.I definitely needed to get out of here. I found Paige in New Books.I think I need to go home, I told her. Im getting a migraine. She looked startled. I had the best track record for attendance of any employee. I never called in redact. Yet, for that very reason, she could hardly refuse me. I was not a plougher who abused the system. subsequently shed assured me I should go, I added, Maybe you can get Doug to come in. That would kill two birds with one stone.Maybe, she said. Im sure well manage, though. Warren and I are here all day.Hes here all day?When she reiterated that he would indeed be on that point, I felt somewhat relieved. Okay. He was off the list.As I walked home to my flat tire, I called Seths cell phone.Where are you? I asked.Home. I forgot some notes I needed.Home? Alone?Do you want to get breakfast with me? I asked suddenly, needing to get him out.Its almost one.Brunch? Lunch?Arent you at work?I went home sick.Are you sick?No. Just meet me. I gave him an address and hung up.As I drove to the rendezvous, I tried Romans cell again. Voice mail. I pulled out the community college phone numbers and started with the first one on the list.What a pain. First, I had to start with campus information and try to get to the right department. Most community colleges didnt even have linguistics departments, though almost all had at least one introductory class taught through some other related area like anthropology or humanities.I made it through three colleges by the time I reached Capitol Hill. I disfranchised a sigh of relief, seeing Seth waiting outs ide the place Id indicated. After I place and paid the meter, I walked up to him, trying to smile in some semblance of normality.It apparently didnt work.Whats unlawful?Nothing, nothing, I proclaimed cheerfully. Too cheerfully.His look implied disbelief, but he let the topic drop. Are we take in here?Yup. But first we have to go see Doug.Doug? Seths confusion deepened.I led him to an apartment building next door and climbed to Dougs floor. Music blared from inside his apartment, which I took as a good sign. I had to beat on the door three times before anyone answered.It wasnt Doug. It was his roommate. He looked stoned.Is Doug here?He blinked at me and scratched his long, unkempt hair.Doug? he asked.Yeah, Doug Sato.Oh, Doug. Yeah.Yeah, hes here?No, man. Hes The guy squinted. Lord, who got high this early in the day? I hadnt even done that back in the 1960s. Hes practicing.Where? Where do they practice?The guy stared at me.Where do they practice? I repeated.Dude, did you know you have, like, the most perfect tits Ive ever seen? Theyre like poetry. Are they real?I clenched my teeth. Where. Does. Doug. shape?He dragged his eyes from my chest.West Seattle. Over by Alki.Do you have an address?Its by atomic number 20 and Alaska. He blinked again. Whoa. California and Alaska. Get it?An address?Its green. You cant miss it.When no other information came, Seth and I left. We went to the restaurant I had indicated. Poetry, he reflected along the way, amused. Like an ee cummings poem, Id say.I was too control to process what he was saying, my mind racing. Even waffles with strawberries couldnt keep me from worrying about this idiotic scavenger hunt. Seth attempted conversation, but my answers were vague and distracted, my mind clearly not with him through the meal. When we finished, I unsuccessfully tried Roman again, then turned to Seth.Are you going back to the bookstore?He shook his head. No. Im going home. I realized I need too much of my research to write this scene. Easier to support in my own office.Panic blazed through me. Home? But What could I say? Tell him that if he stayed at home, he might be in danger of attack by a sociopathic, sorcerous creature?Stay with me, I blurted out. Run errands with me.His polite complacency finally broke. Georgina, what in the world is going on? You go home sick when youre not. Youre clearly agitated about something, desperately so. Tell me what this is about. Is something equipment casualty with Doug?I closed my eyes for a second, wishing this was all over. Wishing I was somewhere else. Or someone else. Seth must think I was out of my mind.I cant tell you whats wrong, only that something is. You have to leave it at that. Then, hesitantly, I reached out and squeezed his hand, turning my eyes pleadingly toward his. Please. Stay with me.He tightened his clutches on my hand and took a step forward, face concerned and compassionate. For a moment, I forgot about the nephilim. What did other men matter when Seth looked at me like that? I had the urge to embrace him and feel his mail enclose me.I almost laughed. Who was I kidding? I didnt need to worry about leading him on. I was the one getting hooked here. I was the one in danger of escalating this relationship. I needed to forgo procrastinating on my clean break with him.I hastily broke apart and lowered my eyes. Thank you.He offered to drive to West Seattle, freeing me up to keep calling colleges. I had or so finished by the time we reached the intersection of Alaska and California. He slowed slightly, and we both peered around, searching for a green house.You cant miss it.It was a stupid piece of advice. What constituted green anyway? I saw a sage house, a tone green house, and a color that could have been green or blue. Some houses had green trim, green doors, or Whoa, said Seth.A small, run-down house painted a glaring shade of mintish lime stood thither, nearly obscured by two much nicer houses.You cant miss it, I mutt ered.We parked and walked toward it. As we did, the sounds of Dougs band clearly emanated from the garage. When we reached the open door, I saw Nocturnal Admission in full glory, Doug belting out lyrics in that astounding voice of his. He cut off abruptly when he saw me.Kincaid?His fellow band members looked on quizzically as he jumped down and sprinted over to me. Seth discretely took a few steps away, poring over some nearby hydrangea bushes.What are you doing here? asked Doug, not offended so much as astounded.I called in sick, I said stupidly. What did I do now?Are you sick?No. I I had something to do. Still do. But Im Im worried about leaving the store. How long will you be here? Can you fill in for me after this?You came here to ask me to cover for you? Whyd you call in sick? Are you finally running away with Mortensen?I no. I cant explain it. Just foreshadow me, after this, youll swing by the store and see if they need help.He was staring at me with a look Seth had been shooting me all afternoon. ane that sort of implied I needed a tranquilizer.Kincaid youre freaking me out hereI looked up at him with the same baleful typeface Id used on Seth. succuba charisma in action. Please? You still owe me, remember?His dark eyes frowned in comprehendible consternation.At last he said, Okay. But itll be a few hours before I can go.Thats all right. Just go at that place straight afterward. No stops. And dont dont tell them you saw me. Im supposed to be sick. Make up some reason to go there.He shook his head in exasperation, and I thanked him with a quick hug. As Seth and I departed, I saw Doug glance at Seth questioningly. Seth shrugged, answering the other mans silent inquiry with shared confusion.I made more phone calls as we drove away, finishing my college list and leaving yet some other desperate message for Roman.What now? asked Seth when I lapsed into silence. Hard to say what he thought of my harassment of both Roman and Doug.II dont know.I had re ached the end of my options. Everyone was accounted for except Roman, and I had no way to reach him. The time was ticking. I didnt know where he lived. I thought hed mentioned Madrona once, but that was a big area. I could hardly start knocking on all those doors. The nephilim had said I had until the end of my shift. Despite bailing on work, I assumed that still meant nine oclock. I had almost three hours left.I guess Ill pick up my car and go back home.Seth dropped me off at the restaurant and followed me back to cigaret Anne. A traffic light stopped him, so I made it to my apartment about a minute before he did. On my door was another note.Nice job. Youll probably end up alienating all of these men with your erratic behavior, but I admire your pluck. One left to go. I wonder how fast on his feet your dancer truly is.I was crumpling this note up when Seth reached me. I pulled my key out of my purse and feebly attempted to put it in my lock. My hands shook so badly, I couldnt do it. He took the key from me and opened the door.We entered, and I collapsed on to the couch. Aubrey slithered out from behind it and jumped on my lap. Seth sat nearby, taking in my apartment including my prominently displayed collection of his books on the new shelf then returned his worried gaze to me.Georgina what can I do?I shook my head, feeling mixed-up and defeated. Nothing. Im just glad youre here.I He hesitated. I hate to tell you this, but Ive got to leave in a little while. Im meeting someone.I looked up sharply. Another of those mysterious meetings. Curiosity temporarily replaced my fear, but I couldnt question him. Couldnt ask if he was meeting some woman. At least he said he was meeting someone. He wouldnt be alone.Youll be with them for a while then?He nodded. I could come back late tonight, if you wanted. Or possibly I could cancel.No, no, dont worry about it. By then, it would all be over.He stayed awhile longer, again attempting conversation I couldnt participa te in. When he finally stood up to leave, I could see anxiety written all over him and felt terrible Id involved him in this.This will all be resolved tomorrow, I told him. So dont worry. Ill be back to normal then. I promise.Okay. If you need anything, let me know. Call me, no matter what. Otherwise well, Ill see you at work.No. I have tomorrow off.Oh. Well. Do you mind if I stop by?Sure. Go ahead. I would have agreed to anything. I was too tired to hold to my earlier notion of distancing. Id worry about that later. Honestly. One thing at a time.He left reluctantly, no doubt baffled when I told him to swing a lot of time with whoever he was meeting. As for me, I paced all over my apartment, not crafty what to do. Maybe I couldnt get ahold of Roman because the nephilim had already found him. That would hardly be fair since Id never even had a chance to genuinely warn him, but this nephilim didnt really seem like the part to care about right or wrong.Struck by inspiration, I calle d Information, realizing Id missed the obvious way to find him. It didnt matter. Unlisted.Two hours before my shift would have ended, I left Roman another message. Please, divert, please call me, I begged. Even if youre really mad at me for what happened. Just tell me youre out there and okay.No return call came. Eight oclock rolled around. With one hour remaining, I left him another message. I could feel hysteria creeping in. God, what was I going to do? All I did do was continue pacing, pondering how soon would be too soon to call Roman one more time.Five minutes before nine, utterly frantic, I grabbed my purse, desperate to leave my apartment and do something. Anything. meter was almost up.What would happen? How would I know if Id successfully jumped through the nephilims hoops? When I saw Romans hit plastered across the paper tomorrow? Would there be another note? Or maybe some gruesome token? What if the nephilim hadnt even meant any of the people Id considered? What if it w as someone completely out of the commonwealth of I opened my door to leave and gasped.RomanHe stood there, mid-knock, as surprised to see me as I was him.I dropped my purse and ran to him, flinging myself at him in a fierce embrace that nearly toppled him. Oh God, I breathed into his shoulder, Im so glad to see you.I guess, he replied, pulling slightly away to look down at me, his turquoise eyes concerned. Lord, Georgina, whats wrong? Ive got like eighty messages from you I know, I know, I told him, still not letting go. Seeing him stirred up all the old, queasy feelings I had thought were buried. He looked so good. He smelled so good. Im sorry its just, I thought something had happened to youI hugged him again, catching sight of my watch as I did so. Nine oclock. My shift was over, as was the nephilims ridiculous game.Okay, its all right. He patted me awkwardly on the back. Whats going on?I cant tell you. My voice shook.His mouth opened to protest, but he reconsidered. Okay. Let s take this slow. Youre pale. Lets go get something to eat. You can explain all this then.Yeah, that would be a fun conversation. No. We cant do thatCome on. Theres no way you can leave me all those desperate messages and then start playing the we need space game. Seriously, Georgina. Youre a wreck. Youre shaking. I wouldnt want you to be by yourself anyway if Id found you like this, let alone after those calls.No. No. No going out. I sat down on the couch, needing to let him go, reluctant to do so. Lets stay here.Still looking distressed, Roman fetched me a codswallop of water, then sat down by me, holding my hand. As time passed, I calmed down, listening as Roman talked about inconsequential things in an effort to make me feel better.For his part, he was quite nice about my psycho phone calls. He continued trying to tease out an explanation, but when I remained evasive, only saying I had cause to worry about him, he stopped pushing for now. He continued cheering me up, telling m e funny things as well as his usual political soliloquies, kick about the irrational rules and hypocrisy of the powers that be.By late in the evening, I was relaxed again, left only with perplexity for the way Id behaved. Damn, I hated that nephilim.Its getting late. You going to be okay if I go? he asked, standing with me near my living room window, overlooking Queen Anne Avenue.Probably better than if you stay.Well, thats a matter of opinion, he chuckled, running a hand over my hair.Thanks for coming by. I know I know it seems crazy, but youve just got to trust me on this one.He shrugged. I dont really have a choice. Besides its kind of nice to know you were worried about me.Of course I was. How could I not be?I dont know. You arent easy to read. I couldnt figure out if you really liked me or if I was just something to pass the time. A diversion.Something in his words rang a bell in my head, something I should have paid attention to. Instead I was more caught up in how close he suddenly stood to me, how his hand ran down my cheek to my neck and to my shoulder. He had long, sensuous fingers. Fingers that could do a lot of good in a lot of good places.I do like you, Roman. If you dont believe anything else I tell you, believe that.He smiled then, a smile so full and beautiful, it made my heart melt. God, I had missed that smile and his funny, breezy charm. Moving his hand back up to my neck, he pulled me toward him, and I realized he was going to touch me again.No no dont, I murmured, squirming out of his grasp.He backed off from the kiss, still holding on to me as he exhaled, disappointment all over his face. Still worried about that?You cant understand. Im sorry. I just cantGeorgina, nothing traumatic happened the last time we kissed. Short of your reaction, I mean.I know, but its not that simple.Nothing happened, he repeated, an unfamiliar hardness in his voice.I know, but My mouth hung there mid-sentence as I replayed his words. Nothing happened. No, s omething had happened that night at the concert, kissing in the back hallway. Id seen Roman trip-up from the kiss. But me what had happened to me? What had I felt? Nothing. A kiss that intense, a kiss with someone strong, a kiss with someone I wanted so badly should have triggered something. Even with a low brawniness yield like Warren, a deep kiss would wake up my succubus instinct, start to connect us, even if no significant transfer took place. Kissing Roman like that especially when he evidently had a reaction should have resulted in some kind of feeling on my end. Some sensation. Yet, there had been nothing. Nothing at all.I had written it off to too much alcohol at the time. But that was ridiculous. I drank all the time before getting a fix. Alcohol could muddle my senses as it on the face of it had that night but no amount of intoxication could completely negate the sensation of anima transfer. Nothing could. I had been too trashed to realize the truth. Alcohol or no, I would always feel something from sexual or intimate physical contact unlessUnless I was with another immortal.I jerked away from Roman, breaking his hold on me. His expression registered surprise, immediately replaced by sudden understanding. Those beautiful eyes sparkling dangerously, he laughed.Took you long enough.